I don’t watch much T.V. In fact, when my husband and I met, I didn’t own a T.V. Then he bought me one. Let’s just say it was kind of a package deal.
All these years later, I still don’t watch much T.V. Aside from a movie with family, or lately, in an attempt to help me manage some late night anxiety, Dominic will turn on Frasier re-runs. I’ve never been able to resist that show. All I have to do is see the white outline of the Seattle skyline begin to be drawn and I’m hooked.
It must have been Saturday night, we were watching Frasier, I was laughing out loud, it was good. Dominic changed the channel and Saturday Night Live was on. There was this hilarious skit about how Valentine’s Day has been appropriated in all these truly awkward ways. By people’s moms and dads was one example, by colleagues and business associates was another. They were all funny. I laughed some more. It was good. It was true. I thought of you.
In true Saturday Night Live fashion, the message was multi-layered: Some people are awkward, some people are manipulative, and unless you’re my lover, on Valentine’s Day, “I don’t want to think of you.”
And, we’re living in confusing times. On the one hand, we love what we do, we love our clients and colleagues. Perhaps, once upon a time, you watched Jack Vincent’s Tedx, “A Sale is a Love Affair,” and it helped you open and “close.” Maybe you learned how to “Win Friends and Influence People,” Dale Carnegie’s way. Or, maybe, you’ve fallen hook, line, and sinker, in love with messaging that was nothing more than a manipulative marketing scheme designed to make you feel you were in a real relationship only to realize there was little in the way of reciprocity and a lot of risk.
Perhaps, then, you realized the roots of many of these on-line marketing schemes: If you haven’t already, you should familiarize yourself with the dark side. Every entrepreneur should read The Game: Penetrating the Secret Society of Pickup Artists by Neill Strauss and see for yourself how the seduction community has influenced the on-line one.
Perhaps it’s my strong literature background that makes this so clear: a love story and a seduction are vasty different entities. In one, “they live happily ever after.” They being the operative word. In the other, one (usually a charming, charismatic, older man) get’s what they want, the other (usually a young impressionable young woman who has been raised on–and desperately wants to believe in–romance) is ruined.
These are crucial differences, dear readers, on Valentine’s Day, and every day, please be discerning.
On a more decidedly positive note, I read a book that really influenced me a few years back. It made me feel–even though I’d only recently made the move from academia to business and felt very green–I already had everything I needed inside me to make The Clementina Collective great. The premise of Tim Sander’s Love is the Killer App is so simple: to be successful, he suggests that we share our knowledge, our network, and our feelings with people we like and would like to do business with…
You can do that, can’t you?
That’s exactly how I felt!
To be clear, I don’t yet have a relationship with Tim. I’m not a follower, or an affiliate partner. I simply love this book’s message and style and think you might too. So if there’s someone out there you’d like to get to know better, or let them know you admire them, to find out–hopefully sooner rather than later–if they’re the real deal, Valentines Day may be a great time to send them a book (or card or e-mail), especially one with the word “Love” in the title if, and only if, you don’t feel too awkward about that sort of thing yourself.
My suggestions are never one-size-fits all. By all means, try them on for size and style but always proceed only with what feels “right” and good to you right now.
You’d be sharing your knowledge, your reading network, and your feelings, and be well on your way to practicing what this book has to teach. And if your intentions are good and pure and rooted in real Platonic love and the person on the receiving end shares those values, you’ll see and feel the reciprocity real soon.
Want even more practice because practice makes progress and good teachers give assignments? I’d be honored if you’d introduce me to anyone you can think of that would benefit and be a good business fit. Making good business introductions should never feel awkward. If it does, you’re either out of alignment or you need more practice.
You can also drop me a line and tell me how you’re feeling. Yes, I really do want to know! Or share a book you think I’d benefit from reading. Reciprocity is very important to me.
And if someone you’d like to introduce me to has already sprung to mind, go ahead and try it… you can tell them you’re thinking of them, what specific value you think I might add, or you might forward this letter or send them this link https://clementinaesposito.com/optin to opt-in and get my writing, and other pertinent news, delivered straight to their inbox usually about once a month because, well, not being annoying makes the heart grow fonder.
And, hey, thank you.
Meanwhile, if there is anything I can do to help you on the road to your full self-expression, and the freedom that comes with it, please don’t hesitate to ask.
Love,
Clementina